For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh? So that they are no more two, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
Matthew 19:5-7, American Standard Version (ASV)
FROM THIS DAY FORWARD…
MARRIAGE PREPARATION
I, N take you N, for my lawful wife (husband) to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part
In a short while you will speak these words to each other as you stand holding hands, before the representative of the church, witnesses, relatives and friends. This should be a moment of great joy as you seal your love for each other in permanent commitment, with words that are serious and vows that are solemn.
Over the next few months you will have much to do. The hall must be booked, dresses selected, honeymoon planned, flowers ordered, etc., etc. The details will be time consuming. Do however, give yourselves an opportunity to get to know each other better. Remember, you expect to spend a lifetime in each other’s company and the better you plan on how to go about this, the greater the likelihood of success.
Have you discussed together your goals in life, what you hope to achieve? Have you examined the values that each holds more dearly? Have you discussed children and how you will bring them up? Have you looked at the differences in your personalities and how you will blend them? How will you discuss and settle difference, rest assured, they will crop up? Do you ever talk about God and religion – (God after all invented marriage and sex and can be expected to know something about how they should function)? Time spent wisely now can pay off later in greater understanding and a closer relationship.
Be convinced, as the late Pope John Paul II put it, of the unique and irreplaceable value that the family has in the development of society and the church herself – it is the cradle of life and love, the place in which the individual is born and grows.
NOW FOR SOME PRACTICAL DETAILS…
ADVANCE NOTICE
Couples planning to get married must contact a priest one year in advance (By Order of the Archdiocese). The Marriage Package should be picked up from the church office during office hours.
DOCUMENTS
Baptism Certificates: These certificates must be obtained not more than one year prior to the date of your wedding from the Church where you were baptized. You may phone the said Church, give your name, date of birth, etc., and they will email or fax the certificate to our parish office (please use stjosephsSC@archtoronto.org). A non-Catholic person, if baptized, should also obtain proof of Baptism (it does not need to be issued one year prior the wedding date). If the mailing address of the Parish of Baptism is not printed on the certificate, please provide this address to the parish office since we are required to notify that church after your wedding.
Confirmation Certificate: The details of this might be present on the Baptismal Certificate, if not please bring your certificate of confirmation.
Marriage License: Apply in person at any Service Ontario, not more than three months before the wedding date. When you receive your marriage license, please bring it to the parish office as soon as possible. DO NOT SIGN THE LICENSE. Also bring to the parish office, the names and addresses of your witnesses/sponsors – for example the Maid of Honour and Best Man.
Previous Marriage: If a previous marriage existed, the following documents are required:
- An authentic certificate or satisfactory proof of death of spouse
- An Official declaration of nullity from the proper Catholic Marriage Tribunal. If your marriage took place in a Non-Catholic setting, please bring both the marriage and divorce certificate. Please note no date for marriage can be given until the freedom to marry has been documented and approved by the Archbishop’s office.
Parental Consultation: Parents (or guardians) must be consulted if one of the persons to be married is under 21 years of age.
Pre-Marriage Course: A Pre-Marriage Course is required by the Church. It is also a most useful part of the serious preparation for the sacrament. As of this writing, the parish is working underway on having this course available in the parish, but in the meantime, you can call the Catholic Family services of Toronto at 416-921-1163 to arrange and do your marriage course. When you have completed this course please bring your certificate to the office for inclusion in your file. Proof of completion of the marriage preparation course is required.
Interfaith Marriages: Marriage between a Catholic and a baptized non-Catholic, or an unbaptized person, is normally celebrated with an “Interfaith Ceremony”, that is without Mass. This allows both parties to participate fully in the Marriage Rites along with their family and friends.
SPIRITUAL PREPARATION
The Sacrament of Marriage is a great event in one’s life. We advise that you receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation or Confession within the month before your wedding. Feel free to go to any parish or Catholic priest of your choice to do this. You can also call the parish office to book an appointment with any of our priests. It is also recommended that you take time, say one weekend or one full day, to make a retreat somewhere for a faith recollection.
PLANNING THE LITURGY
A wedding is the beginning of sacramental married life. The couple is encouraged to make their marriage celebration personal by planning the ceremony with the presiding priest.
- SCRIPTURE: The couple may choose the Scripture readings to be proclaimed at their wedding from a selection provided by the Church in the booklet, “Celebrating our Love” which is available at the Church office.
- LECTORS: The couple may choose a mature person to proclaim the first and second readings from scripture as well as the Prayers of the Faithful.
MUSIC: All music used at a wedding must be Sacred Music. The use of contemporary music will not be permitted at the wedding ceremony. You may wish to bring your own musicians or you may wish to contact our parish organist and cantor in order to reserve their services.
- Organist – Gerard Johnston – 647-979-1061
- Cantor – Larry Tozer – 647-262-6371
WEDDING OFFERING
The suggested Wedding offering for the Church is $500.00. This is to help us cover the costs of utilities, cleaning and maintenance. Please make the cheque payable to St. Joseph’s Parish and give it to the wedding co-ordinator on the evening of the rehearsal.
WEDDING CO-ORDINATOR
Ingrid Stalteri. Phone to book the arrangements for your rehearsal – several months in advance. Note that all those involved in the wedding liturgy must take part in the rehearsal.
Ingrid’s phone number is 416-284-0351 and email is ingridandjoe@gmail.com
ALTAR SERVERS
They are booked by the Wedding Co-ordinator. The fee is $25.00 (cash) for each Altar server, also payable on the rehearsal night.
PHOTOGRAPHY
You will probably want to have your marriage photographed and/or videotaped. It will be wonderful to be able to live again memories of one of the greatest moments in your life. We ask you, however, to ensure that photographers do not intrude on the dignity of the ceremony. Please ask your photographer to speak with the priest or wedding co-ordinator for guidance on times and places where photos will be allowed in the ceremony.
NO PHOTOGRAPHS ARE ALLOWED DURING ANY PART OF THE EUCHARIST.
DECORATIONS
Confetti, rice and flower petals are not permitted. Flowers are the sole responsibility of the couple and all decorations are to be removed after the ceremony. Florists may deliver flowers one hour prior to the ceremony. Flowers and bows on the pews cannot be held by any type of tape, glue or other adhesive substance. Candelabras cannot be lit as they present a fire hazard. Please confer with the wedding co-ordinator regarding placement of floral arrangements and decorations
PARISH OFFICE
It is vital that you confirm names, date and time of your wedding with the Parish Office.
- Parish Office hours are Monday to Friday, 9:00 am to 5:00 pm.
- Telephone number is 416-282-0370
- Fax is 416-282-9378.
- Email address is stjosephsSC@archtoronto.org.
If you have further questions, please call, we wish to be of help. With very best wishes and God’s blessing on your wedding day and throughout your lives.
St. Joseph’s Pastoral Team
Fr. Francis Folleh,
CSSp
Pastor
Fr. Arinze Onwuzulike,
CSSp.
Associate Pastor